There are lots of stereotypes about gaming and gamers which were created about 30 years ago, and though most of them are very outdated and irrelevant nowadays, lots of people who are far from gaming still believe in most of them. Back then, a typical gamer was portrayed as a geeky (and often overweight) nerdy guy who loved comics and board games and was often seen as an outsider with a few friends he sometimes spent time with. Nowadays, the image of a real gamer is pretty different: people interested in games often have modern and up-to-date computers and gaming consoles, they know a lot about computers and newest technical progress, they attend contests and conferences dedicated to games and so on. Lots of them take part in cybersport or have their video blogs or streams where they play games and discuss them with their viewers. It can be a great opportunity to become famous and to earn a good living by doing things you like: though gaming used to be a pretty unpopular hobby in the past, its popularity grows every year and turns it into a huge industry.
For many people dating a gamer is like dating your best friend who understands your hobbies and takes a part in one of the most important activities in your life. Though there might be couples who spend too much time playing video games together, there’s nothing bad in people who follow their interests passionately. A mature couple can find time for important things and entertainment and have a balance in them: a person who can relax and find time for hobbies often is more productive at work and generally happier.
Though in many aspects dating a gamer is just the same as dating any other person, there are a few things you should be aware of in advance. People usually expect their partners to be respectful, honest and loyal, and these things are equally important in any relationship. There are some things about dating a gamer person you should know:
- Respect your partner’s hobby and their passion for it. Everyone is allowed to have interests and to be able to spend some spare time doing things they like. People having harmless hobbies like gaming also have a right not to be judged or pressed because of it. If gaming gives your partner so much emotion and feelings and takes such an important place in their life, then learn to deal with it and respect their right to like things they like. If a person’s hobby doesn’t harm anyone, then no one should criticize or belittle the importance of that thing in their life, so your respectful attitude towards their interest in gaming can only make your relationship stronger and healthier;
- You shouldn’t try to convince your partner that “games are for kids only”. Regardless of your own attitude towards gaming, you should remember that the modern world of video games attracts lots of people of different ages with different income, social status and professions: nowadays there are much more games which are not created for children exclusively than “kid’s games” which were popular in the past. Modern gaming is an industry which attracts people all over the world, and kids are not the biggest part of gamers anymore: game companies create new titles for solvent auditory, so stop thinking that your partner is immature because of gaming;
- Give your partner time to do what they want to do. Though every person who has a relationship should spend time with their partner and give enough attention to them, it doesn’t mean that everyone should spend every spare minute of their life with their significant other. People need time to do their own things, so if your partner wants to relax for a few hours after a tough working day with their favourite video game, then they have rights to do that. Of course, if you feel like your partner neglects you because of games, then you need to discuss that problem with them, but not all cases are potentially problematic;
- Listen to them and show interest to games. Even if you’re not a gamer and have no clue what your partner tries to tell you about, you can try listening to them and understanding things they say: it might be important to them. Lots of people experience very strong emotions while gaming and put lots of time and effort into video games, so their wins and losses become very valuable for them. If it’s hard for you to understand what’s happening in your partner’s favourite game at the moment, then ask them more questions, but don’t ask them to stop because you don’t care;
- If your partner is happy to win - then be happy with them. Gaming is a very emotional experience which influences our feelings a lot: there are lots of examples of people who become extremely mad or euphoric because of their game results. Our brain doesn’t make any difference between our real-life accomplishments and game achievements, so your partner’s win can feel like a real thing for them. If your partner loses, it’s also pretty frustrating or disappointing for them, so be gentle. And no, “it’s only a game” method doesn’t work: yes, it’s a game, but “only a game” sounds pretty neglecting towards their hobby;
- Try playing games with them. Even if you’re not good at gaming, your partner will definitely appreciate your interest in gaming and your attempt to become closer to the world they like so much. Your try will also mean a lot for your partner because you want to spend more time with them and you show them that their hobby is interesting enough for you to play with them from time to time. A lot of gamers are proud of their partners taking part in their hobby: there are really lots of gamers who would spend more time with their partners by playing games together, but they often don’t feel like they should impose their interests on people they date;
- An ultimate way to win a gamer’s heart is to bring them food while they’re playing. It’s not a secret that lots of people are so involved in gaming that they might even find it hard to make a pause for a snack or anything else. Also, lots of modern online games can’t be paused, so it only makes the whole process more time-consuming. You can make your partner very pleased and delighted by bringing them snacks while they’re playing: it’s a great sign of your care and affection and it will definitely be appreciated.