What is love?

We hear and read about love almost every day - but what is love? It’s usually described as something that can be both beautiful and painful, but still extremely appealing to most people. So, what is love in a relationship> And how is it different from loving your friends and family?

by Salina Owens
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It’s totally possible to learn everything about love in theory, but not to know what real love is. In this article, you’ll find the answer to this important question - what is love in a relationship? Read more to learn more about how love feels and how to recognize it.

a photo of a couple on a romantic date

What is love in a relationship?

Love can be different – and that’s why we love our friends differently than our partners. So, what is love in a relationship? Usually, it has some features that make it real.

Mutual Growth

Love involves a commitment to mutual growth. It's a shared journey where both partners encourage and inspire each other to become the best versions of themselves. Through life's challenges and triumphs, the relationship becomes a catalyst for personal development.

Unwavering Support

Love is a pillar of unwavering support. It's the assurance that, no matter what, you have someone by your side cheering you on. In times of struggle, love acts as a source of strength, providing solace and encouragement to navigate challenges together.

Respectful Partnership

Love forms the foundation of a respectful partnership. It's the acknowledgment that each person brings unique qualities to the relationship, and those differences are not only accepted but celebrated. Respect is the cornerstone that upholds the integrity of the connection.

Shared Joy and Sorrow

Love thrives in moments of shared joy and sorrow. It's the joy that is magnified when celebrated together and the sorrow that becomes more bearable when faced as a united front. The relationship becomes a shared canvas where both partners contribute to the emotional landscape.

Love is an environment where vulnerability is welcomed, and trust is paramount. In this safe haven, both individuals can express their feelings openly, knowing they will be met with understanding and empathy.

Emotional Safety

Love creates a space of emotional safety. It's an environment where vulnerability is welcomed, and trust is paramount. In this safe haven, both individuals can express their feelings openly, knowing they will be met with understanding and empathy.

Intentional Effort

Love involves intentional effort. It's the choice to prioritize the relationship, investing time and energy to nurture the connection. From small gestures to significant acts, love is demonstrated through the consistent effort to show appreciation and care.

Intimacy Beyond Physical

Love transcends physical intimacy. While physical connection is a part of it, the depth of love extends to emotional and intellectual intimacy. It's the shared laughter, meaningful conversations, and a profound sense of closeness that define the relationship.

a romantic couple in the field

What is the difference between loving and being in love?

After learning what the meaning of love is, it’s time to find the difference between what true love is, and what being in love is. While these things might feel similar, they aren’t – but one thing can always turn into another.

Loving: The Foundation

Loving is the foundational layer, akin to the roots of a sturdy tree. It's a deep affection, care, and concern for someone. When you love, you actively show kindness, offer support, and appreciate the person for who they are. It's a steady and enduring sentiment that forms the groundwork for a meaningful connection.

Being in Love: The Blossoming

Being in love is the blossoming of the emotional seed planted by love. It's an immersive experience, marked by passion, excitement, and a profound emotional connection. When you are in love, there's an intensity to your emotions, a heightened awareness of the other person, and a magnetic pull that goes beyond affection. It's the emotional fireworks that elevate the connection.

Loving: Inclusive and Stable

Loving is inclusive and stable, like the warmth of a cozy fireplace. It encompasses a broader sense of care, including familial, platonic, and romantic love. Loving is the steady flame that persists even when the fervor of being in love might ebb. It forms the backbone of enduring relationships and provides a sense of security.

Being in Love: Intense and Dynamic

Being in love is intense and dynamic, reminiscent of a dance under the stars. It's characterized by heightened emotions, a sense of urgency, and a desire to be close to the person. Being in love brings an extra layer of excitement and unpredictability, making it a captivating phase that often defines the early stages of a romantic relationship.

Being in love creates a profound impact on your overall state of being, often transcending rationality and logic.

Loving: Demonstrated Through Actions

Loving is often demonstrated through actions, the everyday gestures that show you care. It's the consistent effort, the reliability, and the willingness to stand by someone's side. Loving is expressed through the reliability of actions that speak louder than words.

Being in Love: Felt in Every Fiber

Being in love is felt in every fiber of your being, like a resonating melody. It's a visceral experience that influences your thoughts, emotions, and physical sensations. Being in love creates a profound impact on your overall state of being, often transcending rationality and logic.

a portrait of a happy senior couple

How to know if someone loves you?

If you’re not great at reading people and their feelings, then you might be interested in knowing what true love is. If someone isn’t just interested in you, but actually has deep feelings, then it shows – and these things might help you see that.

Consistent Presence

When someone loves you, they consistently show up in your life. Whether it's celebrating your victories or standing by you during challenges, their unwavering presence speaks volumes about their affection.

Active Listening

Love is attentive. Notice if they actively listen when you speak, remembering details about your day, interests, and aspirations. Their genuine interest in your thoughts signifies a deep connection.

Supportive Actions

Love manifests in actions. Look for consistent support in both big and small things. From helping with daily chores to being a pillar during tough times, genuine love is reflected in the support they provide.

Respectful Disagreements

Love withstands disagreements with respect. If they express differing opinions without belittling or dismissing your perspective, it shows a commitment to understanding and nurturing the relationship.

If they take pride in your achievements and genuinely rejoice in your happiness, it shows their feelings.

Emotional Availability

Love requires emotional availability. If they are open about their feelings and encourage you to express yours, it indicates a level of emotional intimacy crucial for a loving relationship.

Thoughtful Gestures

Small, thoughtful gestures often convey profound love. From surprise notes to considering your preferences in decision-making, these gestures showcase a person's investment in your happiness.

Celebrating Your Wins

A person who loves you celebrates your victories as their own. If they take pride in your achievements and genuinely rejoice in your happiness, it shows their feelings.

Acts of Service

Love often manifests through actions rather than words. Observe if your partner goes above and beyond to make your life more comfortable or enjoyable.Recognize the small gestures that showcase their commitment to your well-being, whether it's helping with tasks or surprising you with thoughtful deeds.

Future Inclusion

Love extends into the realm of future plans. If your partner consistently incorporates you into their long-term visions, it indicates a desire for a lasting connection. Pay attention to discussions about future goals, dreams, and aspirations. If you find yourself seamlessly included in these conversations, it signifies a shared journey ahead.

Vulnerability

When someone loves you, they allow themselves to be vulnerable. If they share their fears, dreams, and insecurities, it reflects a level of trust that is foundational to a loving relationship.

Physical Affection

Physical touch is a powerful communicator of love. Notice the frequency of affectionate gestures, whether it's a gentle touch, a hug, or a spontaneous kiss, as these actions convey love non-verbally.

a happy Asian couple

How to understand that you are in love?

Finally, lots of people don’t always understand what real love is even when they experience it themselves. It’s often connected with the fact that some people grow in love slowly, without even realizing that it happens. Here are a few signs that will help you understand what unconditional love is and how it feels.

Unconscious Smiling

Pay attention to your facial expressions. If you catch yourself smiling involuntarily at the thought of someone, or even while doing mundane tasks associated with them, it could be a clear sign that love is in the air.

Empathy Overdrive

Love amplifies empathy. If you discover an intensified ability to understand and share the feelings of the person you're drawn to, it suggests a deep emotional connection indicative of love.

Eager Compromise

Love involves a natural inclination towards compromise. If you find yourself willingly making concessions or adjustments without resentment, it demonstrates a desire to prioritize the well-being of the relationship.

If you can share moments of quietude without discomfort and feel a deep connection in the absence of words, it's a sign of profound emotional intimacy.

Future Fantasies

Love often extends into the realm of imagination. If you catch yourself daydreaming about a shared future with the person, whether it's mundane daily activities or significant life events, it's a strong indicator of romantic feelings.

Heightened Sensitivity

Love makes you more attuned to the nuances of the person's emotions. If you become acutely aware of their moods, even subtle shifts, and respond with genuine concern or happiness, it signifies emotional investment.

Natural Prioritization

Love subtly shifts your priorities. If you discover an instinctual inclination to prioritize the happiness and well-being of the person you're in love with, it reflects a natural reordering of your values.

Comfort in Silence

Love isn't always loud; it's often found in comfortable silences. If you can share moments of quietude without discomfort and feel a deep connection in the absence of words, it's a sign of profound emotional intimacy.

Heightened Senses

Love can heighten your sensory experiences. If you notice colors seem more vivid, music sounds richer, and scents become more evocative in the presence of the person you love, it's an indication of emotional intensity.

Butterflies Take Flight

The classic fluttering feeling in your stomach is a timeless sign of falling in love. If you experience a mix of excitement and nervousness in the presence of the person, it's a delightful confirmation of romantic emotions.

people holding hands

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29.03.2020

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