While Italian men are recognized worldwide as the most passionate and handsome, it might be tricky to get on with them if you are unaware of their peculiarities. If your desire to get to know Italian culture is still here, we are happy to present you facts you should know before dating an Italian man.
Italy is a dream country for many people, almost Heaven-like. Sunny and warm, with a long history and broad art scene, it catches attention and never lets go once you come here and dating an Italian man for many women is a chance to get a piece of this country's tradition. Best traits and traditions of this southern country are collected in the personalities of its men. Italians are often thought to be one of the sexiest nations in the world.
Although Italy is quite a small country, cultural differences between its various regions are incredible. We can talk about the mentality of islands, the rich industrial and poorest agricultural regions, religious areas, which spent centuries under the influence of the Catholic Church, regions where Catholicism has historically been less important, but will be too complicated. It is easier to divide Italy into three parts: North, Center and South with islands (Sicily and Sardinia).
The closer to Sicily, the stronger everything looks like a cinematic picture: jealous parents, mother-in-law commanders, everyone around yelling, screaming, waving their hands and eating pasta with pizza and sweets.
Northern Italy is much more modern and vibrant, here the influence of temperament and the Church is much weaker. For example, in Southern regions over 70% of marriages are made in church, in the Central regions about half, and only 40% in the North.
Southerners respect religious and cultural traditions. Their main rule is "Moglie e buoi dai paesi tuoi”, or “Do not take a wife and a bull from afar”. Approximately 6% of the inhabitants create a family with non-Italians. In the Central and Northern regions the number rises to 15%. The difference between geographical poles is so great and so full of stereotypes that a resident from the other side of Italy is perceived almost as a stranger, but in a good way. Italian hospitality is legendary, and it is fully true, sometimes even more than you can imagine and want to experience.
As mentioned before, Italian traditions take a great part in the hearts of people from this part of the world. You will never mistake an Italian man with anybody else. Their culture is part of their nature, and that involves devotion to family, place of birth and national cuisine. As for the character, it’s a very distinctive part of Italian people, with its good and bad sides.
If you happen to date an Italian man, it might be unusual and overwhelming at first. For some girls several dates are more than enough to understand it’s not their cup of tea. Others find Italian temperament especially appealing. If you have never been in a relationship with a man from the Italian nation but find it curious to try, our collection of fascinating facts about Italian men can serve you a good deal!
Italian men value family
No stronger bonds can be found in the world than those between an Italian man and his family. Nowadays it has taken a whole new level, as many guys choose to live with their parents rather than find their own place in life. Family relations are so vitally important for Italians, that it was estimated that this becomes a reason for divorce: when it comes to choosing between a spouse and parents, Italian men always choose the latter.
Italy is still the region of Europe which doesn’t want to step back from their traditions that have been forming for years. So while you choose to date an Italian man you automatically sign up to valuing his customs the way you value yours. That includes respect to all his family members, sometimes even exaggerated.
If you serve all requirements set by strict and opinionated family members of your partner, you can be lucky to get their blessing for your further relationship and even marriage. What concerns meeting Italian man’s parents, you should remember a few things:
- You will get acquainted very early. Opposite to the now widespread western tradition to meet your fiance's parents shortly before engagement, Italian men prefer to bring their woman into the family circle pretty fast. They need to know for sure, you are approved, otherwise a chance for your affair to last is very small;
- Learn Italian traditions beforehand. If you are not sure what to do at Italian family dinners or celebrations, ask your guy to make a little excursion over their culture. Try to remember how to behave and what to say, it will help to make a good impression. Good thing to know will be unique traditions that his family has, as these may differ in each household;
- Find out if they are strongly catholic. Though Italy is now a technologically developed country a lot of people there still remain true to religion, be it the influence of the Vatican or just the way they were raised. Discuss with your boyfriend the topic of how catholic traditions influence his family in particular and what is expected from his spouse-to-be from religious point of view.
To be honest, Italians are very sensitive when they deal with the choice between relationships and loneliness. Even while suffering from constant arguments, they still stay with their partner, because being alone is quite scary for them. A lot of Italians never had the experience of living independently, only with their parents or mates, so being left alone seems worse than any issue.
Mother is the most valued family member
While dating an Italian man, apart from just respecting his family and traditions, don’t forget about his mother. Remember that your boyfriend’s mama is not your competitor at any point. If you love Italian men, be ready to love their mamas as much.
On one hand it might seem odd. Starting a relationship you always expect the attention of your chosen person to be concentrated on you, while here you are only the second woman in a guy’s life, never the first. An Italian guy will consult with his mother about everything and spend hours on the phone when being away. If you were raised in a different culture it is not an easy thing to accept.
But the way to an Italian heart is through the love of man’s mother.
Try to build a good relationship not only with your significant other, but with his mama too. Become her friend, always be on her side, show respect and pleasure to spend time together - and eventually you’ll end up with a strong ally on your side.
The other benefit Italian men get from being close with their mothers is understanding women. If they manage to get along with a woman who raised them, they will find the key to any girl’s heart, as women often have similar desires. And if something goes wrong and he can’t find the way out of the trouble himself, he can always consult a female who has a whole life experience to share.
Passion is the base of Italian man’s character
Italian passion and emotions are not a myth. Sometimes it seems that everything they are driven by are their feelings solely. Compared to Italians the rest of the people in the world may seem boring and cold, but it’s just that Italians are exaggeratedly passionate.
- In Italy people like a good conversation. The one they can chat in. Learn to be a good listener who is honestly impressed by every story your companion tells. Each story told by Italian is more than just a story, it’s a whole performance with all the gestures and hand movements you can imagine.
- Italian men in love are passionate, so they are angry. If a row happens between you too, don’t be afraid of your partner openly showing your emotions and raising his voice. It’s just the way he’s used to show his feelings and it’s in now way an attempt to offend you. It’s just that the national concept of expressing emotions is very specific, so it takes time to accept it.
- As for the other ways Italians translate their passion, it can be jealousy. Italians are famous for their possessiveness, so if you are a fan of open relationships or just not sure you want to spend your whole life with this particular guy, think twice about devoting yourself to this kind of affair. Being jealous can be overwhelming at times, so if your significant other starts judging your friends on the base of their gender, maybe it’s the time of a serious conversation and setting the boundaries.
- On the other hand, when seeing a single woman out in the streets, Italian guys are not embarrassed to catcall and whistle. They do not try to offend you or be unpleasant. This is a sign of them being impressed by a beautiful woman.
There is no surprise in the fact that Italians talk a lot about love and their feelings. Well, surely they speak a lot in a melodic, singing language, a lot of things in their culture are built around love. They can easily switch from the correct Italian or English to the dialect of their native region and emphasize the shades of their sentiments with active facial expressions and generous gestures. Even knowing the language poorly, you can roughly guess what the interlocutor is talking about and how he or she feels. At least, it facilitates communication and encourages next steps of conversation.
Italians are passionate about everything, but feelings and relationships are the concentration of this trait. Sometimes problems can be literally invented out of thin air. They yell at each other, crush dishes, curse, then make peace, then break up with scandals, then return to each other again. Sometimes this circle is endless. But maybe it’s not the worst way of resolving conflicts, especially knowing that relationships here mainly last for years (if not decades).
Italians will be truly shocked if you try to settle a conflict using negotiations instead of getting into an argument. You will probably be asked if it is a common reaction in your homeland. However, not all Italians are satisfied with this national trait. A lot of them would say that it’s much easier to date foreigners who do not argue on each possible insignificant occasion.
But you need to know that Italians never rush with official marriage. If everything is good in a relationship, distances and visa difficulties are not a problem. They are very devoted to their home. Italians also find it weird to spend extra hundreds and thousands of euros on rent when they can stay close to the family, so be ready to become really close to your partner’s parents.
There can be a year gap between a proposal and a ring and the wedding itself. Also sometimes a ring does not mean a wedding at all: many couples use it just to show people around that they are in a relationship. If the ring means the proposal precisely, the ceremony will be delayed for some time because Italian weddings need a lot of attention. They are always expensive and huge, with hundreds of guests and enormous preparations.
Italian cuisine will be the center of attention
If you have already impressed your Italian date by finding an approach to his mom, time to master your cooking skills. Pay special attention to the way of cooking national dishes. If something goes wrong in your kitchen, your mistake will become the centre of attention.
Pizza, pasta and risotto are the three pillars of Italian cuisine.
Perfect your skills in cooking these dishes, remember about digging into traditional recipes - appreciation of traditions is a must in Italian cuisine as well as in any other sphere of their life. But don’t limit yourself with these recipes - do your research and find out there is plenty more food Italian land can proudly feed you.
As well as perfecting your skills in traditional cooking, develop yourself in the sphere of cookery in general. Diversity on the table is a chance to impress your man with something unusual he has never tried before. Be genuinely interested in this subject, educate yourself on healthy and unusual food, so that there is always a room for chat at dinner.
Eating out is yet another thing Italians love to do. Authentic restaurants can be found in any smallest village, serving a variety of delicious meals. And when you go for a family event, don’t forget to praise the food your boyfriend’s mother cooked - you should always remember that what she cooks is the best thing you can try in the entire world.
